Too blessed to be a blessing?

Blessed to be a blessing.

You've heard me say it before. For Steven and I, it's been a mission statement for our lives and marriage.

Lately however, I've had this taunting thought...
"Are we too blessed to be a blessing?"

At training last month, we spent a day on adversity. One of the exercises was to go through our life experiences and chart out the hard and difficult times. The purpose was to show God's goodness through the struggles while also trying to understand how we specifically react to adversity.

We heard many moving stories that day. People with Job like testimonies. Some with experiences that I could never imagine living through. And as I looked at Steven and I's puny "adversity charts", I became jealous.

Weird reaction, I know.

But seriously, the worst thing on Steven's chart was being benched his freshman year on the basketball team. Mine was my breakup with my high school boyfriend.

Lame.

Steven and I are fully aware that we do not know suffering. And while I am in awe of God's goodness towards us, sometimes it makes me feel a little guilty. And even more so, it makes me wonder if we'll be less effective because of it.

This idea was reinforced through a hard conversation with a good friend the other day. In my attempt to identify with his struggles, I probably overstepped my boundary and told him in more or less words to just "suck it up".

Note to self: That is not a good one-liner to say to someone who is hurting. Especially when you don't know their pain.

And so in his frustration with me, he reacted with some harsh words. "You think you're gonna go to Thailand and tell those people about God. Well let me tell you something, the last thing they will want to hear about is God. Those people have had hard lives filled with pain and suffering. And not only will they not want God, they won't want to hear it from a privileged girl like you who has never walked a day in their shoes."

Ouch. His words stung me to my core--not because they were hard to hear, but because I've silently had the same concern in my own heart for quite some time.

And so, I retreated to Steven and cried in his arms, asking him if it were true...

Are we are too blessed to be a blessing?

Will anyone take me seriously when I haven't gone through anything serious? It is easy for me to speak of God's steadfast love when my life has been nothing but smooth and steady. How will I explain God's faithfulness and goodness to someone who hasn't experienced it? What will I say to someone who is angry with God when I've never been?

And as I was processing these concerns to Steven, he did what he does best. Listens intently to my bundle of emotions and anxious thoughts and then gently speaks simple wisdom.

"Lauren, it's not about the messenger. It's about the message."

And with that, a sense of relief immediately came over me. He was right. I am so thankful for a husband who constantly brings me back to Truth.

"It's not about you or me. People aren't drawn to the Gospel because of the messenger. They are drawn to it because of its message of love, grace and forgiveness offered through the sacrifice of Jesus Christ. It's not about the gift wrapping. It's about the gift."

Truth.

"And let's not worry about people being angry at God. Because if anyone has the right to be angry at God, it would have been Jesus Himself. Leaving His home in heaven to live among those who hated Him to die the most gruesome death of all time. All for people who still reject and deny His name. Babe, God can handle their anger and Jesus can understand their hurt. Jesus knows the deep blessing that comes from deep suffering better than anyone. It's not our battle to fight or burden to carry."

More Truth.

No more feeling guilty about this blessed life the Lord has given me. Whether immense blessing or unending suffering, it's all for the GLORY OF GOD. Who am I to rob Him of that or to doubt in His perfection and sovereignty? I must refuse to believe the lie that we are too blessed to be a blessing and instead cling to the truth that God uses all things, all people, all circumstances for His glory.

For I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.... And my God will supply every need of yours according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus. To our God and Father be glory forever and ever. Amen.

Philippians 4:11-13,19-20

A holiday treat!

Well, it's been way too long since my last post--almost a month! I think I needed some time away from all the emotion and deep processing. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate it's sanctification...but man, it can be heavy!

Thanks to everyone who's been praying for us--it's been a good couple of weeks back at home. We are feeling really prepared and ready for whatever's next! Praise the Lord with us.

So to keep things *merry and bright*, I thought I'd share a delicious recipe for those who want to try something new this Christmas morning. One of my greatest joys this fall was volunteering at Mika's--Steven's aunt's coffee shop. Aunt Linda opened Mika's 6 years ago not knowing what would happen, but knowing that God had called her to this crazy venture and would see her through it. Now, Mika's is thriving--it's a warm and quaint place for people to come and drink good coffee, hang with friends, and eat great homemade food.

And mmmm....I wish all of you could taste her food. Everything she makes is simply delicious. No lie. I loved watching her in the kitchen. I would follow her around asking her thousands of questions--probably annoying her to death but being too fascinated to stop. Being at Mika's not only confirmed my love for food, but my love for loving people through food.

So, without further adieu, here's Mika's deliciously fabulous cinnamon rolls. (These suckers are so good that I had to call my mom and grandma down for the day to learn how to make them. Needless to say, Yuki was pretty darn excited.)

Mom and Grandma Yuki intensely listening to Grandma Unsicker--the cinnamon roll pro! She comes in to Mika's every Tuesday to make a couple of batches.


Grandma Unsicker telling me that "these pictures better not show up on the Internet!" Opps. Sorry, grandma!
Okay, here we go :)

In 3/4 cup warm water, dissolve 2 packages of yeast. (Aunt Linda says the yeast makes a difference, so make sure it's fresh!)

In another bowl, combine 3/4 cup sugar and 3 eggs. Next, add 1/2 cup of melted shortening, 1/4 cup of melted butter and 1 1/4 cup of milk. (Hey, I told you these were delicious. I never said they were healthy!)

Then add the yeasted water to the mixture--stir and combine. (Sorry, no picture of the combining!)

Next, in a large separate bowl, combine 6 cups of flour and 1 teaspoon of salt. (One perk of living in the country is that you have access to really random country stores. Aunt Linda uses this special type of flour that she gets from a sweet Mennonite lady--she sells the stuff, along with other baking goods, out of her home in the middle of nowhere. It was quite the scene, I'm sure, when my Asian-self pulled up to her "store" one fall afternoon... Old Mennonite lady with a bonnet, meet young Asian-suburban girl in a cute sundress. Yikes.)
Anyway, the flour is a high gluten flour. It's really fluffy--similar to the consistency after sifting. I think this is the secret to what makes the cinnamon rolls so light and scrumptious.
(Here Grandma Yuki is inspecting this new type of flour...)


Now add flour a cup at a time to yeast mixture and mix until thoroughly incorporated.

Kneed mixture until semi-smooth.


Keep going....


Once the dough isn't sticky and seems to keep its shape pretty well...


...transfer it over to a buttered bowl. Cover it and place it in a warm spot--it needs to rise for about an hour!


Intermission: While the dough was rising, Grandma Yuki took it upon herself to pass out her homemade caramel popcorn to everyone and make new friends with anyone that walked into Mika's! Gotta love her.


Back to the rolls...
Once the dough has finished rising, roll it out in a rectangle, about 24 inches by 10 inches, and to a thickness of 1/4 to 1/2 inch.


Brush dough with melted butter.


In a bowl combine 3/4 cup sugar, 1/2 cup brown sugar and 4 teaspoons of cinnamon. Sprinkle mixture over melted butter.


Along long side of the rectangle roll dough up, like a rug.


Trim ends and slice roll into rounds about 1/2 to 3/4 inch thick. (You should get around 14 rolls.)


Dip both sides of rounds in cinnamon-sugar mixture and arrange on a grease sheet pan.


Cover and let rise for 30 to 40 minutes. Bake at 400 degrees for 15 minutes or until golden. Cool and then frost with your favorite homemade butter cream frosting.

And then of course, ENJOY!!!!!!!


As you could probably tell, it was a hesed-filled day. Two grandma's in the kitchen, sharing stories and old recipes...it just doesn't get any better than that.


A big thanks to Mika's and Aunt Linda for allowing us to take over the kitchen--it is a forever memory for us Ishikawa girls!


With Christmas fast-approaching, I hope we can all take time away from the busyness of life and get in the kitchen with the people we love. Whether it's baking Christmas cookies, making Christmas Eve dinner, or trying out this fabulous cinnamon roll recipe, may you cherish the sweet moments and tastes with your loved ones this holiday season.